‘Pain’ful Indeed

Mark Wahlberg, The Rock, stuck in rancid Michael Bay comedy ‘Pain & Gain’

By Lori Hoffman
Add Comment Add Comment | Comments: 0 | Posted May. 1, 2013

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Michael Bay, the director famous for putting the biggest bang in big-bang movies and conversely, the least amount of character development and emotional connection in his big-screen efforts, thinks he is presenting a change of pace with his so-called comedy Pain & Gain.

Perhaps Bay connected with this based-on-fact, sordid tale about idiotic bodybuilders turned into idiotic criminals because the story was so insane it seemed like a bad movie idea to begin with. Bay could apply his action-on-steroids style to a movie about guys actually demented from doing too many steroids and that gave him carte blanche to take his cinematic excesses to the next level. Unfortunately, that next level did not equate into laughs, not with a violent ambiance that is far from comedic.

One feels sorry for the cast, in particular Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson who is trying so hard to earn laughs playing a born-again cokehead in an environment that makes those laughs impossible to deliver. Mark Wahlberg and Anthony Mackie are also stuck in this dilemma, and then there is Tony Shalhoub, who is expected to earn laughs because, as the victim of the criminal plan, he is so arrogant and repulsive we are supposed to think it is funny when he gets tortured and forced to sign over his house and business to these bozos.

When the trio totally screws up killing him, and he reports the scheme to the police, they don’t believe his story because it is: a) ridiculous and b) he was born in Colombia, so he must be involved with drugs. Only the latter plot point evokes just a hint of the satire this story was designed to evoke.

In conclusion, satire delivered with a sledgehammer doesn’t work. 


Tilton Theatre Reopens 

If you’ve been wondering when the Tilton Movie Theater would re-open, including an IMAX screen, we now have the answer. Frank Theatres Tilton 8 & IMAX in Northfield are introducing their IMAX theatre with the official opening of Iron Man 3 tonight, May 3, at 9pm and midnight. The 400-seat stadium-style theatre boasts an 85-foot screen with Series 2 IMAX Digital Projection and Sound, and high back rocker seating with snack-top table armrests. All seating may be reserved in advance on-line at, at the on-site automated box-office or at any one of the 6 POS stations at the concession stands. Theatergoers will be able to forgo waiting in line and arrive knowing their seats are saved. Parking is free and there is no extra charge for 3D IMAX features.

“The Tilton Theatre has been a community landmark since the early 1970s,” says Bruce Frank, President and CEO of Frank Entertainment Group, which acquired the venue in 2011. “We are pleased to bring the most enjoyable and convenient experience to all with a magnificent new theatre, no additional charges for 3D IMAX movies and free parking.”

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