Location: My Heart
Dateline: 06.17.11
ATLANTIC CITY — Damn, the old man makes sense now. Why couldn’t I see it when he was here?
Dad would be 99 now, dying a month shy of his 89th. Last Saturday cousins gathered for a 90th birthday party for his sister Celly (Marcella). Dad’s other surviving sister, Ria, 94, was also there. 2 of 11 Rosenbergers are still around, And, suddenly, I was, staring him in the face with every word my aunts spoke. All I can say, it’s great when the dead visit you.
Dad lived right next door to me when he died, something my mother arranged the day before a final stroke sent her to a nursing home for 18 months. She knew what she was doing though she didn’t tell me at that time. Dad visited her everyday — all day. When they married the families did not expect it to last.
Rita Schubert was a college educated daughter of a main line attorney. Hutz, 11 years older, was a son of german immigrants, who never finished grade school.
On their 50th anniversary, in that nursing home, I saw two people more in love than the day they got married. And I thought, "Wow … to outlast seven kids, and all the ups and downs life brings in 50 years — no wonder they call this the greatest generation.”
My father and I fought over our similarities. He was a free and independent thinker…. but his thoughts didn’t always agree with my free and independent thoughts. We approached life from different angles. His years next door to me during my mother’s sickness and after her death were our finest moments. There was no more fight in us over stupid things. I had finally grown up. Funny thing is, it’s only since his death my real growth has begun. Damn, the old man makes sense now. Why couldn’t I see it when he was here?
This led me to thoughts of my own children:
Son Gerard, 20, is a wonderful addition anywhere. Carefully nurturing those around him, genuinely concerned for their well being, and leading them where they need to go. I first noticed this years ago when he started playing team sports. If anyone was ever hurt, penalized, affected in a game in any way, he was always the first at their side, and the last to leave. That seems to carry through as I watch him show up at family parties, start things in motion, and balance his younger cousins in grade school with his older cousins in their 20’s and 30s.
Daughter Annie, 17, is my favorite date in the world and always will be. She adds energy to my smile and an extra bounce to my step whenever I am with her. I see her as god’s grace shared with me. Additionally, she reminds me of her mother, GiGi, my first true love, and continued friend.
Divorced since my kids were young, I have had the easy part. I show up and smile after the hard work is done. A brilliant woman raised brilliant children, inside and out.
Dad’s years living next to me were our finest moments. There was no more fight in us over stupid things. I had finally grown up. Funny thing is, it’s only since his death my real growth has begun. Damn, the old man makes sense now. Why couldn’t I see it when he was here?
Here’s what remains to be said. Thank you one and all. I love you. And, most importantly thank you dad. I’m listening now to every word you ever said and I ever rejected. I love you and think of you more than when you lived next door.
My greatest wish for Father’s Day is to sit on the beach with my children, doing absolutely nothing at all and share the love you shared with me.
“And it’s so nice not to be in competition with each other anymore. Nobody is judging us. We don’t have to worry about what [judges] Nigel or Mary [Murphy] are going to say. You can relax and just have some fun out there."
Congress is considering legislation that would mostly stop lending to any homebuyer who does not put down 20 percent toward the purchase of their home. QRMs (Qualified Residential Mortgages) are being argued by the FDIC as a solution to the weak housing market.
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1. Jed said... on Jun 20, 2011 at 05:57PM
“Geoff, I always knew that you could talk up a storm but to write and then get published WOW!!! The article about your dad struck a nerve He was a great man. I remember him from my visits to Margate. He was always on base we just didn't see it at the time. Why is it that our parents are gone that we finally see it. You know we'll never be able to explain it to our kids. I only hope that we have or will become our fathers. Happy Fathers Day!!!
”
2. Jed said... on Jun 20, 2011 at 05:57PM
“Geoff, I always knew that you could talk up a storm but to write and then get published WOW!!! The article about your dad struck a nerve He was a great man. I remember him from my visits to Margate. He was always on base we just didn't see it at the time. Why is it that our parents are gone that we finally see it. You know we'll never be able to explain it to our kids. I only hope that we have or will become our fathers. Happy Fathers Day!!!
”